Mindset, motivation and multiple sports, the Tri Me Tapes are the audio journal of an amateur athlete, Abi Dawson.
Seeking a new challenge and an opportunity to improve her mindset Abi made the commitment to try new sports and compete.
Initially, she identified triathlon as a true test of grit, physicality and most importantly mental fortitude.
Join Abi and her partner in crime Matt as they discuss the journey to competition, the highs, the lows and lessons learnt along the way.
In this tape of Tri-Me Tapes Podcast, Abi makes the tough choice to quit training for triathlon, we discuss the rationale behind it and lessons learnt along the way. Plus we prepare for a new challenge in series 2 of the Tri-Me Tapes. Thanks for sharing the experience with us so far!
If you are a new listener to The Tri Me Tapes, we would love to hear from you. Please visit our Facebook Page and share your athletic adventures!
In this episode, we discuss:
01:00 Recapping the training & looking at more races
02:50 Preparing your first triathlon season
03:55 Training in Covid Lockdowns
06:06 Swimming training with no access to pools
08:39 Priorities & commitment to training
10:55 Mindset around waiting 12 months to compete & enjoyment of training
13:22 When the fun becomes a stress
13:55 Why is Abi doing the training? Doubt about quitting.
15:27 Training solo and what a team can offer
15:57 Making the choice to quit
17:42 Being okay with changing your perspectives
18:22 Sharing the choice with Coach Jimmy
19:00 Key learnings: Personal development & being part of a team
21:47 Reflections on training overall
23:12 Competitive vs calm dualities
26:10 What's next?
28:42 Crossfit announcement and why crossfit
Follow our Podcast
Explore these Resources or Items Mentioned in the Show
In this episode, we mentioned the following resources:
Check Out More Tapes
Thanks For Listening, Reading And Sharing. Don't Forget To Subscribe!
Hosted by Captivate.fm. Sign up for your free trial HERE. (referral link)
Transcription
Matt: What documentary did you watched that inspired you?
Abi: If I end up crying on this, I'll open my heart.
Matt: Its a very personal journey. Tape? Secret tapes.
Abi: It is a personal journey.
Matt: No one is supposed to find these tapes.
Welcome to the Tri-Me Tapes, an audio journal of an amateur athlete. I'm Matt
Abi: And I'm Abi.
Matt: And we're here to discuss Abi's athletic adventures. So we made it to tape eight. If we've got any listeners after the monster that tape seven was, that's a Whopper
Abi: I had a lot to say.
Matt: You did. I couldn't edit it out because it was all pure gold, gold mine of stuffs.
Abi: So I'm glad you think so.
Matt: Hmm.
So tape eight, the final episode. I guess we should jump into those final few blogs. So the first blog, when we finish off in tape seven, you booked your event. You'd had a rest week. You were feeling better. The next blog is called Halt. It just starts with sort of saying your training was building up nicely, four weeks until that first race at Woking.
What was happening for you around then?
Abi: I think I was again feeling more comfortable in the training and more confident. I still think I was on the back foot, a little bit of feeling tired. So maybe not quite as recovered as I should have felt in trying to progress. And maybe I should have communicated that a little bit more with Jimmy.
Matt: Were you looking forward to the event? A month to go where the 12th of March, 2020.
Abi: So I think what was happening at the time was Crowborough, we're going to do a triathlon as well.
Matt: Right? Okay.
Abi: They were putting up more details about their course and where their transition was gonna be.
Matt: Okay.
Abi: And it was if you know, Crowborough, the at Goldsmiths, you would come out of the pool and you had in the middle of the track where there's a gated playground and that's where you would leave your stuff and your bike and your helmet.
And that was all I could envisage. And every time I thought about it, I just thought, Oh my God, I'm going to get stones in my feet. I'm going to trip. I'm going to look like a right muppet. It's so windy around there. It's got its own climate. So I thought, God, and you get blown off my bike, trying to get on the bike.
And I know it was not exactly the same as Woking, but I had planned on maybe doing the Crowborough one as well because it was in the area and it would've just been another
Matt: Before, it was before then?
Abi: No, that was going to be in July.
Matt: When we talked in tape six and seven, there was a little bit of self-doubt as to whether you were going to be any good at triathlon and whether you were actually enjoying it or not, but you'd committed to it. But at this stage, you were thinking about doing two?
Abi: Three, actually, it was advised by Jimmy then that you would do three because your first one you're so inexperienced and it could go completely the wrong way. And that's when you could learn from it. And the next one you would go, you, maybe you could think about where your flaws were and what you could improve. And then the last, like, is it just a little bit of a combination of the two.
Matt: All that built up experience, trying to put it into place and see what you can do.
Abi: Pretty sure that I'd planned on doing the Woking one.
Matt: So the working one was booked and you're going to do the Crowborough one after that. What was the third one?
Abi: I think it was Seven Oaks?
Matt: Okay.
Abi: Which is apparently really hard course when I said it to people, so I was like, yeah, maybe I won't but,
Matt: We'll see how we go on the first two, but you didn't, you didn't do any of them. COVID came along,
Abi: Crushed my dreams
Matt: And kyboshed your dreams. How did that affect your training?
Abi: At first? Because it was a lockdown, most places were shut, especially like gyms. So the strength training that I could do, I had limited weights. So you would use dumbbells or kettlebell that I borrowed from my gym. And you could go out for exercise. I think that the guidance was very limited to where you could go. So people were taking the Mickey a little bit of going a little bit further distance on their bike and taking advantage of the clear roads as well because no one was going anywhere which was quite cool. Like I did like that. And runs were still the same cause obviously I go out for a run, but then there was that rule where you could only go out once a day for exercise when they said about like the period of time that you could go out.
Well, I thought, well, if I do my bike ride, which is maybe like an hour and a half, and I'm going to go out for a run, are they going to watch me?
Matt: They're going to Hawkeye. We'll get you on the satellites.
Abi: She's, she's been out already
Matt: Camera, tickets, while you're running.
Abi: But it is so new that it literally did feel like that. It was like, Oh my God, like, what are we allowed to do? What aren't we allowed to do.
Matt: To be fair, where you were running, you decided to change from track and road running to trail running
Abi: Because it was more fun.
Matt: Because it was more fun because it drew your attention away from the running more than.
Abi: I liked the scenery. I liked dodging the roots on the ground. *laughs* I did actually, I do like dodging. I do like looking at the ground and I like watching my step
Matt: OK
Abi: and I feel like I can just push a little bit harder. Whereas, with each stride on a road run, I'm thinking, Oh my God, my knee or that was really heavy-footed. Pick up your feet and all that sort of stuff, but whereas on a trail run, you're just thinking,
Matt: Stay on your feet, stay on your feet, stay on your feet,
Abi: Yippee Wahooo!
Matt: Skipping through the woods. Um, so there was no swimming, obviously. There was no swimming you were doing.
Abi: Can I just say? This is revolutionary for some, for maybe some, but there was, I think Jimmy might have done this with some of his clients, but they put like a couple of resistance bands hooked on something and then you would hold those resistance bands, arms above your head. Yeah. Hold the resistance bands hinge from your hips, and then you would go straight arms and like pull back. So like you were doing a front crawl and that's how people were training. Like keeping up there,
Matt: You didn't fancy that? We had the resistance bands and everything. Why don't you tell me that it an option?
Abi: I did do some banded work. It's not exactly like out of the ordinary. I just thought, I thought it was funny that I did think it was a joke at first, but
Matt: I think one of the things the one of the skills that you sort of learnt, re-learnt or learnt doing triathlon training was finding your balance point in the water and that can only be done in water. So that was something you really needed to gain strength in, doing any kind of banded work. Wasn't what you needed to improve?
Abi: No. However, I think it's a bit like riding a bike. I'd be really interested to see what I'd be like in the water now, trying to remember all those skills that I learned, because I think I'd like pick it up quite quick.
Matt: Right.
Abi: But maybe that, I don't know if that's to do with swimming or if that's to do with just me. Cause I probably enjoyed out of the three that, that was my favourite and I had to be really conscious of what I was doing because it had such a limited time in the pool.
Matt: What was the one you had to put the most attention to? And you've mentioned that in other tapes that the swimming was the thing that you had to build into your schedule first because it was a public poll and it wasn't open 24 hours and you know, your shifts as well.
Abi: And there was more technique or guidance for technique.
Matt: Right.
Abi: Whereas the others is like, just get the, get the hours in.
Matt: Okay. So turbo training as well still?
Abi: I was turbo training yeah. We were moving as well.
Matt: We did move right in the middle of this, yeah.
Abi: So stuff was getting packed. That was stressful. Things were just chaos, like all over the place. And obviously then trying to find the right time to, well, COVID, you'd have all the time in the world, but it's still sort of the right time and the motivation to get up and go and do it when you've got my things to pack.
Matt: Yeah, we had lots to do. And was training a priority at that moment when there were bigger fish to fry, on all fronts for you?
Abi: Yes, it was. I think we had a conversation that it actually was, it was my priority.
Matt: Yeah, it was because you'd committed to it. And you felt that anything other than a hundred percent was the wrong intention to have like you couldn't, you didn't want to take your foot off the gas because you'd come so far. And you'd recently got over a real low trough period of sort of being almost exhausted with it. He didn't want to just sort of let everything else getting the way of it.
Abi: Yeah, I remember that was kind of the first thing that was set up? Did I train on the day that we? No, I didn't train on the day that we moved maybe the day after? Think I trained?
Matt: Yeah. You're turbo training in the garden, weren't you?
Abi: Yeah, after we had that like humongous pizza, because we did all the heavy lifting and everything ourselves, and we sat on the sofa, just wanting to smother ourselves in
Matt: ... pizza.
Abi: Pizza. We do that now, every now and then.
Matt: Just an insight into our lives that people just do not need. So, yeah, so it is your focus. It was your priority. But from my point of view, at the time we're talking end of March, early April, you are letting triathlon training rule your life.
And I use those words very carefully. You are letting triathlon training rule your life. It dictated everything. It dictated your mood, your diet, your time. Talk me through like how it felt for you. Obviously, lockdown was a big deal. The swimming was stopped, but you could ride, you could run. You did have weights in the garden.
Abi: I liked the fact that I was being pushed and I thought that because I was being pushed, that I was getting quite good or better or progressing. So I liked having that push, confident, somewhat confident in my ability.
Matt: So because Jimmy was still programming new stuff
Abi: Yeah
Matt: and it was getting harder.
Abi: Yeah.
Matt: That you felt like that was progression.
Abi: Yeah
Matt: Cause it was getting harder, but it wasn't, the novelty's worn off. The skill sets have been developed.
Abi: It wasn't a novelty. I think I really needed the competition to know the baseline of where I was at.
Matt: And how is that affecting your training, knowing that competition had been cancelled? How was that affecting your mindset going into training?
Abi: I thought it was pointless. Not pointless, but just kind of like fizzled out.
Matt: At the time, you said that you couldn't wait a whole year to understand whether you liked or were good at the sport?
Abi: Yeah. So I think that, because it, this is the first time that I've tried something, a new sport because I've always been involved in hockey.
Matt: Yeah.
Abi: I didn't know whether I should really still enjoy it because I hadn't got anything to mark it against. Whereas, like in hockey, like if you score goals or if, you know, that you've done a quite good performance. So you've got women at the match kind of thing.
Matt: You've got that team spirit as well. You win as a team. That's nice.
Abi: Yeah. That's instant feedback. Whereas all my training had been by myself and I didn't love it. So,
Matt: So there wasn't, you didn't have that perspective of completion of a training session was a win or progress in a training session that you wouldn't have been able to do that wasn't a win. You weren't getting that buzz from the training.
Abi: I always think that. I do think that's a win. Every time I do a training session, and I would always go into it like a hundred percent. And each time that I would do a training session, I'd finish it and be like, that was good.
Matt: Yeah.
Abi: But also like, Jesus Christ thank God, that's over because it was hard. And I liked it, but it was challenging, but I always needed to get motivated to set up my bike, to go out for a run. It wasn't ever like, Oh, like I get to train today. It was like, Good God, it's today. I need to plan what time I'm going to do it so I can plan to fuel myself. I can plan what's how I'm going to recover. I need to know how many days I've got to recover. And then the reduction of my training being like, I don't have didn't have swimming.
I was like, Oh, I was like the best part that I liked. And now that's gone too. So no, I'm just going to be like running and biking and the bike was really hard. The running, I haven't I'd still had niggles.
Matt: Was it making you unhappy?
Abi: Probably.
Matt: Well.
Abi: I think, yeah, I was stressed.
Matt: Yeah. So the whole process of training for a triathlon has now turned into a stress.
Abi: Yeah.
Matt: And if we go back to tape one, this was about building a better mindset, overcoming adversity. Do you not think this is a brilliant opportunity to overcome adversity at this moment? April 2020, the world's locked down. You can't train the way you want to train. Okay, you got to wait 12 months to do your event.
Abi: You're saying adapt and overcome?
Matt: At the time, did you not see that as an opportunity or?
Abi: No. I had a battle with myself of being like you've said, you're going to do it so bloody do it. And then I had the other little angel or devil, I don't know which one would come at this angle, but basically saying, why carry on?
Matt: Right?
Abi: How are you doing it for?
Matt: Right.
Abi: What are you doing it for?
Matt: Well, I mean, that's, again, that's been the purpose of all the tapes. The whole purpose of this exercise is, why are you doing it?
Abi: Yeah, and it was for mindset. And I think like over a few conversations that I had for various people UBM one was that it doesn't matter that I don't do it now and that, and to actually come to a decision and stop it is as much as a strength as it is to carry on, I thought. Especially if it makes I'm shocking making decisions, especially like, if it means that I look weak or that I've not done something that I said I was going to do.
Matt: Yeah. Certainly do you into that sort of penultimate blog, which is called, Corona Calls It. You decide in this blog that, that's it you're training as a triathlete. You can't go on.
Abi: I can't go on. Clawing to the door. Yeah.
Matt: But you're saying this competing may have lit more fire in my belly to continue. However, I know that I need to find new challenges that push me to be better. And that's where you got to with triathlon. It wasn't having any positive outcome beyond getting better, the physical.
Abi: And I think I only experienced it in one element. I think that you said it as well, that when I went to go, I trained with the guys at VO2 Max in the pool. And I came away from that really happy because I was more of a team. So is it like, it was just fun. And also people like complimented me and said, like I had a good natural talent and yeah and I liked it.
Matt: It wasn't you.
Abi: That wasn't me going out. I did better than last time or well done Abi.
Matt: Talk me through that, that decision-making process of "I'm quitting something. I said, I wasn't going to quit" over," I'm quitting something that's not making me happy". In fact, it was ruling your life in so many ways that it wasn't the intention.
Abi: I get very emotionally caught up in things. So I think that's why it took over my life. To make that decision was really tough and it drained me. But then to, I think what made it better for me or easier for me, it was talking to other people and then going well, like that's okay. And then for me say, Oh yeah, it was okay.
Matt: How did it feel when you made up the decision in your head, once you made your mind up, once you decided, yeah okay, you're right. This isn't a
Abi: Oh God, I have to text Jimmy and
Matt: I'm asking what, how you felt first before the message to Jimmy before you send that message to Jimmy and say, I'm a quitter.
Abi: I felt elated.
Matt: Did you?
Abi: Yeah.
Matt: Okay.
Abi: I felt like it was lifted off of me and that everything that I could do now for exercise could be what I wanted to do rather than that. And I know that's so wishy-washy with me because I think before it even did triathlon, I would talk about weightlifting and how I lost the love of doing that. And I didn't want to lift a heavier back squat and I didn't see the point of it and blah, blah, blah. And then it just cycles back to actually that is my interest now and yeah.
Matt: Yeah. It's being sort of empathetic to your own decision making like, it's okay that I didn't want to do that then. But I do want to do it now.
Abi: I think that's what as well, what I've learned maybe over the past year, properly about myself is that I do change my mind quite a lot. And I think that's okay.
Matt: Yeah. Maybe it changes how you deliver your opinions or your mind.
Abi: Yeah.
Matt: At the time, because you know, full well that you might actually have your mind changed at some point, there's no point being too staunch.
Abi: And I actually like it. I think it's a little bit more freeing than just having an opinion and being like, I'm sticking to this and I know I'm open to other people's perspective or yeah. Yeah, even prove me wrong.
Matt: Yeah. You enjoy that. You don't mind being wrong now?
Abi: No.
Matt: So this message to Jimmy, how did that feel?
Abi: Sinking.
Matt: Sinking, failing.